The Thunder and The Ship

Yesterday morning I got up; pulled my fictitious surfboard out from under my bed, hopped on and began the ride. Riding the wave of mid life emotions. The water was a tad choppy to say the least.

These days it seems that if a crack appears and mortar is not near, then the nucleus of the egg births into a Komodo Dragon, rather than a baby chick. For now, what I am suggesting to self is that we will have no more cracks in the egg. My quads are weary and my board has been out so much lately that it barely has time to dry so it is getting mildew issues from the dampness of the salt water, and really the alkaline of tears can get to be a bit much on ones face.

Now this all being said...as the day drew on and tides shifted so did my perspective. Sometimes all it takes is a gentle reminder that the next wave is the one that will allow me to find my feet again.

I travelled to a friends place as the waters calmed, and when I left I took my emotions with me, but chose not to ride my board home. I stowed it safely in the back seat.

Driving home last night the skies were slightly over cast. As the night darkened and I drove on the lightning was off to the left, just over and behind the foothills of The Purcells, Columbia Lake spreading far to the East drenched in the Fairmount Range. As I listened to the music, and meandered along, the travel was lighter and the air had a freshness to it that I had not noticed earlier.

Looking in my rear view mirror I saw the bolts of lighting striking towards the horizon in the deep grey darkness of a stormy night beginning to set, the highway laying behind me like a zipper. I was reminded of how dark it can seem at times, and the gifts that our time in the darkness can give us. The rewards returned from persevering through the struggle.

Returning my eyes to the direction home, the night sky was lit the colour of an orange sucker and the clouds were a grey blue. I don't know how to say it, so I will just say it.

There it was...THE STAR TREK ENTERPRISE....lol!

It might sound a bit loose in the skull. But that is what I saw in the formation of the clouds and it gave me hope. Not the actual Starship Enterprise. Seriously what do you take me for? LOL.

It can get tough when I feel like I am not contributing in the path that I "thought" I should be. Truly this is myself just being unhealthy, not practising universal acceptance for all that I am. Simply put, feeling sorry for myself for no tangible reason. Rationally I have so much, more than many, less than few.

So there I was licking my wounds, the sun baked and wind chapped skin, from my day on the board, driving down the highway. As my tires took me towards my bed I was grateful for the reprieve from the constant pressure of self, and there it was.

The Star Trek Enterprise.

A sign in my artistic mind that our species and The Universe, is on a path that someday will bring peace to us here on this planet.

Yes I think about these things, I care what happens. We matter to me. The unfortunate truth is that often I might take on a tad to much sense of responsibility, building my reality into an undeserved sense of grandiosity; allowing me to flog myself to the point of... well, let us just leave it at the surf board analogy for now. This being a much gentler picture.

Although I am not exactly sure where I think I should be, and I am not being my perfect self all the time;(this possibly being due to the fact that I might have been born with an invisible tail.). I believe in us, in a future that reaches out not decades, but centuries.

It was the reward for riding my board today. For putting up with myself. My Star Trek Enterprise. Hope, hope that it was all going to be alright.

Pulling into my parking spot, I pulled my board from the back seat but did not get on it. It can go back under my bed for now. If only for a small moment in time may we stop focusing on our fear of the sharks in the water, we can stand with two feet on the ground for awhile and look to our future. One that is full of hope, opportunity, and a place for dreams to be built.

I say we, because I know I am not alone on my ride.

Peace.